WTF is my body doing?

This will be a fairly short, bulleted, and likely all over the godamn place post, but I need to write it down to make some sort of sense of it.

Remember when I said I was afraid I ovulated to soon and it was going to make me have to go from Europe straight to Denver for CCRM? Haa, once again I have apparently tempted the universe and it is now laughing at me for attempting to even plan anything.  

  • According to the OPKs I ovulated on CD13 (earliest ever and gave me some hope that all the supplements were doing there thing).  However I was a bit suspicious since I didn’t get sore boobs like I normally do the day after.
  • I got the sore boobs around CD16 but had a negative OPK.  However we were on vacation so at least we were having fun vacation sex right around that time.
  • I expected to get my period last Wednesday – it is always exactly 13 days after ovulation except for the times I was on Femara when it would be around 14 or 15.  No period in sight although I have had some cramping.
  • If I did ovulate on CD13 it is now 19 DPO.  If I ovulated on CD 16 it is now 16 DPO.
  • I have been testing (because I cannot help myself) and so far everything has come up negative in the 5 minute time after the test. But – I happened to have a test from 2 days ago in my bathroom drawer (because of course I would save them, like they are going to miraculously change into positives and it is super hygienic and normal to have negative pee sticks everywhere, but I digress) and this morning it had a second line – 2 full days after the test.  The line is gray not really pink that  I can tell, but it is a FRER which I’ve never seen an evap on before, although I don’t know if I have ever checked an old one since by now I ALWAYS have my godamn period and I have gotten sad and angry and thrown all the pee sticks away.  This morning all I had left in my stash was a digital (leftover from IVF #1 when I was so hopeful, ha) and that of course came up with the glaring ‘Not Pregnant’ on the screen.

So the rambling question that I can’t answer for myself is WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE?  Is this some kind of ‘chemical’ (I really hate that word) happening way too late for any hope, are my tons of supplements just throwing my body out of whack, is it an evap and I am silly for even looking at it again or maybe I will get my period any second and this drama will be over.  I was thinking of maybe calling for a blood test if I haven’t gotten the period by Saturday (although that seems awkward since I think I would call my old clinic that now knows I am planning on CCRM) – but that also seems desperate and crazy and sure to end in a negative result making me feel even sillier and sadder.  

Thanks for listening to my rambling insanity – any advice from anyone that has been in a similar situation and how it turned out would be most welcome.

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10 thoughts on “WTF is my body doing?

  1. I wish I could help!! I’m in a similar boat, except I never really had regular cycles before. So I’m basing everything on my stupid tracking app! I’m like on CD43, no BFP and no sign of AF in sight… I’m going nuts

  2. I feel like my body hates me too! I basically had AF for 3 weeks last cycle. A portion of the time I thought it was possible implantation bleeding, but it wasn’t!

  3. Ugh. Stupid, uncooperative cycle! I can tell you from having had a chemical pregnancy – I got a period and it was actually on time. Most women I know who have had a chemical pregnancies had bleeding pretty close to their expected period date. And I think that even on the FRER, you can’t go by a test result after 10-20 minutes, so I would ignore that one that came up as positive days later. I wish I had something helpful to tell you. However…. I do think if you don’t have your period by Saturday, you should get a blood test drawn. I know women who have never gotten a positive on a pee stick test, but come up as positive with the blood test, so that’s really the gold standard. I hope you get some clarity very soon.

    • Thanks lady – your advice really helps. No period in sight still so planning on calling the clinic in a few minutes to book a beta for tomorrow to see if we can tell what the hell is going on here.

  4. I don’t have a real comment but I wanted to comment. 🙂 Hey Ute, listen up and either be pregnant or don’t but we’re getting real tired of this tweener shit. And the not pregnant for 40 weeks shit but do we really need to rehash that?! Love you.

    • I adore you and your sense of humor. This comment and the ‘you just might have a super tan, extra sparkly my little pony up in that ute.’ comment from a few weeks ago are seriously the best things anyone has said to me about all this crazy shit. Tweener shit – I wonder if anyone else has ever lambasted a ute for pulling tweener shit, I spit up my coffee reading that portion. And seriously – a message to both utes – we demand 40 godamn weeks of pregnant bliss on none of this heartbreak and drama. Love you too 🙂

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