I should have known that the infertile moms (I assume all of you that posted a comment are infertiles as that is how you found my blog, or just really cool fertiles) would come through with helpful and non-judgy advice. So thank you all for that.
I ended up seeing a lactation consultant for one last round of advice. She viewed AV eating and weighed her, and she did eat some, but only about 2-3 ounces from one long feeding on both boobs. She also makes a clicking noise while eating that doesn’t hurt me but is a bit of a mystery that the LC hadn’t seen before. The LC suggested doing 1 or 2 direct boob feedings a day to see how they went (and allow me to drop a pump and keep some sanity) as well as revisit my doctor as my nipples look like they still have thrush for some difl.ucan since the nipple ointment is obviously not doing it, just reducing it enough to help with the pain. Another thing she suggested was talking to my pediatrician about having AV do a round of thrush treatment as well, even though we don’t visibly see symptoms as well as a probiotic to see if either of those helped at all with the clicking sound. So I am now on a round of diflu.can and baby is on Ny.statin as well as probiotics (any of you out there have your baby on probiotics? Would love to know if you have seen any changes). We are doing a breastfeeding session in the morning and she is still not eating very long, about 10 minutes in total and then going to the bottle for a few more ounces, but it makes me happy and she is getting fed, so we are good with this plan. I’m still pumping 4 other times a day and while I still hate it, at least it feels a bit more manageable. I’m going to try this until I go back to work in 3 weeks (3 weeks! not ready for this) and then we’ll see how it goes when I am at the office all day. My goal is to try and do this method of one direct Bfeeding and the other 4 pumps until 6 months, but if I need to make the switch at 4 months I am fine with transitioning to formula – as many of you suggested I am weighing quality of life and time with her vs making myself insane with the pumping.
Other than that things are going fairly well except that she is regressing a bit in the sleep department – taking a lot longer to go down at night and then waking up to feed at least once in the middle of the night. The middle of the night is easy and I know that she is hungry, but the going to bed is a bit rough. We are trying to put her down much earlier at the advice of all the sleep books, but last night we did 6:30 and she didn’t actually sleep until 8 – we would put her down before that and she would be wide awake and happily kicking her legs in the crib and then have to be totally re-soothed. We are also trying the Magic Merlin sleep suit as a transition from the swaddle since she had started to escape it – so far it seems to be working pretty well (her fighting bedtime started with the swaddle as well) and it has the added bonus of making me laugh every time I have her in it, she looks like a baby stay puff marshmallow man, it is fucking hilarious. Going to keep trying earlier but other than that there is not much else we can do at this age since she is too young and small for any sort of real sleep training so we will just hope she reverts back to the great sleep of last month before I have to go back to work. Again any sleep advice for a 3.5 month old is most welcome 🙂
That’s it for now, I have a post in my head about how I feel about going back to work and the big changes that will come with that along with the hopes of someday taking pictures of her nursery, hopefully both of those will happen soon.
Sending love to everyone out there still struggling, I am thinking of you all often.